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asleep at mal 9/09
http://www.lettersofnote.com/2010/03/most-beautiful-death.html This… 
3/25/10 23:18
asleep at mal 9/09

This hit me in a lot of places, but most of all in the parts that are broken. When it's time for me to face death I hope that I do it as painlessly, as peacefully, as Aldous Huxley seems to have done.

If that means someone has to feed me a hallucinogen so I can get lost in my own mind and let go, I would ask that you do so. I feel like I'm not afraid of death as a whole, that my consciousness will cease to be and my body will be recycled (in part I hope to help others live) as part of our world, and that the energy that makes me tick will become a part of the universe again.

I have no intention of letting go of life right now; I plan to keep fighting for the things that matter to me. But when I hit that point where it's obvious I'm not going to make it, pull the plug, remove the machines, and give me whatever I ask for to ease my way to that peace.

I know for me music will be a necessity, plug in my hard drive and start with the stompy crunchy stuff and the 80's/new wave "cheese". But when I start to drift toward the end, Delerium, Portishead, Ella, Billy, et al, and phreddiva's Fifth Element should be on random shuffle.

I also want to be surrounded by those I love, preferably at home, as it will be easier to let go.
3/26/10 14:22 (UTC) - Seriously.
I fyou have specific end of life wishes - services, organ donation, etc - you should WRITE IT DOWN & have it notarized/or in some way attached to your will/living will, if you have one.

Vince used to go on & on to me about how he wanted a Roman funeral rite, w/ coins on the eyes & everything. Then I reminded him about his crazy Catholic family, and, did he write it down? 'cause legally, crazy Catholic family will trump feisty, pesky fruit fly. ;)

I should take my own advice. Like you, I have a decent idea of what I'd like to have happen. Since I'm fairly distant form my family I should tell my friends, just in case. Not morbid as much as it is considerate.

Though we both have health woe, I hope our going at home w/ friends is many many years away. <3
3/26/10 15:06 (UTC) - Re: Seriously.
In addition to this, be as specific as possible about everything. Having helped my mom a bit with my dad's funeral, I can say that every decision that doesn't have to be made by grieving loved ones is like a gift for their peace of mind. Big details that are important to you - open casket or closed, cremation or interment, what religion, what priest, what church or other location, what not to do if that's not your thing, viewing or no viewing, all that stuff. Any little details are good too, like what music you'd like to be played during the service, what kind of flowers you'd like, any readings you'd like, etc. etc. There are so many decisions to be made, and none of them are fun. Leaving instructions isn't morbid, it's helpful. (Well, unless you want things that are hugely expensive or a big pain in the ass to make happen, but that you haven't started preparing for yourself, but you know what I mean.)
3/27/10 8:31 (UTC)