Pain has been a part of my life for so long, and my tolerances have increased by so much over the years that today's good day (a 5 or 6) would have been a 10 out of 10 on my pain scale of 2000. It doesn't get any better, and it continues to impact my life in huge ways.
The pain isn't even the thing that bothers me the most; I hate the fact that my brain doesn't work as well; that my arms, hands, legs and feet are numb all the time. It limits my ability to do everyday tasks like showering or cooking or going to the store.
I find myself angry about the impact this has had on my independence, and I wonder if we'll ever find the right combination of medications and exercise to return some semblance of normalcy to my life. But I am still fighting, one day at a time, and I am thankful for all of the good things I have in my life; my friends and family; the occasional day when I get more than "one thing".
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